Truth be told, at first I was completely ready to let this horse shit pass. I figured nothing could be worse than the hack job of a ninth-grade opening paragraph that Griffin wrote for his other story in this morning’s paper:
“It makes sense that the best player in baseball is also its highest paid. However, despite all of his myriad regular-season accomplishments, Alex Rodriguez has never, ever been the game’s best player in the post-season. His has become a love-hate relationship with Yankees fans who have 26 World Series wins, but none thanks to A-Rod.”
But then the asshole came up with this: “With many teams, injuries will open the door for young players from the farm to step up and grab the major-league bull by the horns, giving them the break they needed to establish themselves as budding stars. (See: Boston’s Jacoby Ellsbury; New York’s Phil Hughes, Joba Chamberlain).”
How about Toronto’s Dustin McGowan, Shaun Marcum, Casey Janssen and Jeremy Accardo, you fucking twat????
And for fuck sakes, what the fuck was this all about????
“Most opposing managers are playing chess, while Gibbons is playing checkers. He claims that several of his players have the “green light” to steal, yet they don’t. He claims that even though opponents steal with reckless abandon against his team, there’s nothing he can do. His confidence in some of his pitchers is day-to-day, relying on the same four arms in the bullpen while others languish and lose confidence in themselves.”
Anybody who reads this site knows that I’m as big a fan of spurious logic as anyone, but let me get this straight: John Gibbons is a moron because players who have the green light don’t steal, because the Jays aren’t willing to fuck with Halladay, Burnett and McGowan’s deliveries, and because Gibbons loses faith quickly in pitchers who are complete bags of shit.
And who said this? Rich Griffin!?!!? Well shit! Why didn’t you say so??? He used to work for the Expos (didn’t you know?), so he couldn’t possibly be a pompous fucking windbag so full of his own shit that he doesn’t even bother thinking through his own points anymore because he’s got such a boner for his own smugness that actually saying something informative and interesting is completely fucking secondary to sitting there stroking his own fucking smug-boner with his head firmly entrenched up his own ass.
(FYI, I can totally relate)